Have you ever thought you have to change something that you are doing? And then simply not done it because to keep on doing what you have always done felt much easier?
Habits seem hard to change, but once we have overcome the first obstacles, I usually find it harder to go back to how I used to be doing things.
2019 is here, and we are many who think about changing something in our life. A New Year seems to call for some kind of action. I usually notice people’s New Year’s resolutions at the gym. In December, it’s quite empty, but come second week of January, you have to stand in line to get to the machines. It’s almost like I think I should promise to stop going to the gym in January, it’s simply too crowded.
Now, I’m not one who makes New Year’s resolutions, really. I start with something new whenever. At least when it’s about lighter, not so serious stuff.
Like when I stopped drinking coffee. It happened after I had been thinking about it for a while. I kept drinking the machine coffee at work (which was disgusting) out of habit. Every time I gulped down a cup, I felt like I did something wrong to the inside of my body. Then, one night, I had a dream that this coffee turned into tar and coloured my insides all black. I remembered the dream when I woke up and didn’t feel like having coffee that day. Not the next day either – and that continued for about two years. I didn’t put much of an effort into it, really. Then my father got sick and I felt a need to have coffee again – so I got back to drinking it. It wasn’t a big thing – stopping or starting. It’s not like drinking coffee is dangerous. But it can be addictive – at least I was drinking a lot of coffee before I stopped. Now, I’m at a moderate level – and I still don’t drink the machine coffee at work.
To me it’s a matter of starting to do something. Change is a process, and the first step is to do it once. After that, you just keep doing it. Working out, cleaning, eating healthy or whatever the thing is that you would like to change. After a few times, it feels like this is the way it should be and going back is not an option.
Of course, some things are harder to change than others. Real, big change is a totally different matter. Today, I am just talking about minor stuff. But sometimes that can be hard enough.
Thinking about it, I wonder if it’s perhaps also a matter of not forbidding yourself something.
I never forbade myself coffee. I knew I could choose to drink it whenever, but I just didn’t do it. If I forbid myself stuff, it becomes something I think about more than I would otherwise.
For me, it’s more a case of saying “I want to do it like this now.”
I find, it works best for me to think about change as something positive, that I want to do.
And this is applicable when it comes to many different situations. Whenever you need to change something, it’s possible to make it easier by finding the positive aspects of that change and holding on to them – even if it’s having to change jobs, going through a divorce or dealing with different kinds of conflicts. I’m not saying it’s easy – I know it’s not – but I’ve found that changing my mindset just a bit, can go a long way.
How do you deal with change?